You’ve never felt true love. Not once in your life. You’re so desperate that you bought a “love potion” on the internet for $185 an ounce. You bought five ounces, just in case it really works.
The box is lying open in front of you, but now you’re having second thoughts. Can it be true love if it’s caused by a drug? You’re assuming it’s a drug, anyways.
When you pop open the top, the smell hits you like a bag of croquet balls. It smells suspiciously like cat urine that’s been kept out in the sun for five years. Tastes like it, too.
Tonight is either going to be the best night of your life, or the worst.
Or maybe you’re going to stop suspiciously copying Anchorman!